The Big Climb Sunday, March 21, 2010 In Memory of Ezra Sherman Go Team Ezra!

We feel so honored that Ezra was selected as the 2010 Big Climb Honoree!

69 Flights of Stairs

1, 311 Steps

788 feet of Vertical Elevation

Climb the Columbia Tower - Seattle's Tallest Building

Are you up for the challenge? Please join Team Ezra to help us raise money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. To find out more about the Big Climb, visit www.bigclimb.org

Our family had a great experience participating in the Big Climb earlier this year and we all felt like it was a wonderful way to honor Ezra and to raise money for Leukemia research, as well as other blood cancer research, and also to financially help patients and families currently dealing with these diseases. We encourage all to join us - kids, adults, everyone. Don't be afraid of the climb, you can do it! Many of the 5th graders completed the climb in about 15 minutes or even less! And most of the adults were not far behind. You may sign up to walk or run up the stairs - your choice.

We Hope You Will Join Us!

Ezra Remembered

So once a year at our church the children, aged 3 to 12, put on the service for the congregation. As you can imagine, it is pretty sweet and everyone looks forward to it all year. This year of course was bittersweet, watching Milo give a talk - of course he did great, but it was the first time Ezra did not stand up to participate.

One of Ezra's past teachers, Tyler, shared some thoughts about Ezra. Tyler was Ezra and Milo's primary teacher (like sunday school) a few years back. He and his wife Stacy taught the boys in their primary class for two years and have remained close friends with our family. Tyler's remarks were beautiful and when I asked if I could share them on the blog he consented. So here they are...

"We would be remiss not to acknowledge that the primary program today proceeds without an incredibly important member. Ezra Sherman and the Sherman Family have been long time members of this ward - he and his siblings have grown up through our nursery and primary, and his parents have been constants here for the last 17 years. Ezra was an irreplaceable part of our primary and for many years blessed us with his incredible goodwill, tender spirit, and exuberance for life. As everyone knows, earlier this year he returned to our Heavenly Father , and this is the first time in many years that he is not a part of today's program.

It would be impossible to capture what he meant to all of us in a few short words, but we wanted to in some way honor his memory. I think the best way to do this is to recognize that he lives on. He lives on in his brother, in his sister, in his parents, and in all of us who were lucky enough to have been touched by his life. He also lives on in the things he loved and the passions he enjoyed in life.

One such passion was the Beatles. Ezra was a big fan - we had that in common - and when I hear the Beatles, I always think of him. There is a moment in the album Abbey Road that for me captures the emotions one experiences in difficult times. At the end of the song, "She's So Heavy," there are several minutes of swirling, disorienting noise. This noise starts in the background, but slowly builds, much in the way that you might picture a gathering storm. At the point when this musical storm feels as if it has reached it's peak, it instantaneously cuts off and immediately cuts off and immediately proceeds into the next song - the melodic and uplifting tune, "Here Comes the Sun," with George Harrison singing that reassuring refrain, "here comes the sun, it's alright."

In the scriptures, the sun is symbolic of numerous things and in many instances it represents Christ. In the Doctrine and Covenants, section 88:7 reads: "Which truth shineth. This is the light of Christ. As also he is in the sun and the light of the sun, and the power thereof, by which it was made." During our stormiest times, it is Him that emerges through the clouds and warms us with His glory, reminding us that through His saving power, "it's alright." As the living Savior of all, He assures us that our time on earth is not the end, but merely the beginning. In the words of the oft quoted scripture, in the book of John, "whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have eternal life." (John 3:15)

Through His triumphant resurrection, He makes it possible for us to live again in the presence of the Father. It is through our belief and testimony of Christ, that we can look forward to seeing our friend Ezra again someday."

So thank you Tyler, for your thoughtful words, they were greatly appreciated and sweet to our ears. Although I wish nothing more than to have Ezra in my arms and at my side - right now, I know that he is alright. I know that I will see him again and that he will always be my boy. I have faith that we will be reunited when this life on earth is over and I look forward to that day. That is what I believe. Even in my pain and deep sorrow of missing Ezra, I still have faith in these things. And it is this faith that keeps me going each day.

Photos shown: top - Ezra, of course, age 8. Below - Tyler and Stacy with Milo, age 9 (yellow, a wickersham brother), Luka, age 10 - (Yertyl the Turtle), and Ezra, age 9 - (Mayor of Whoville). Performing in Broadway Bound's production of Seussical the Musical at the ACT Theater in Seattle.

Halloween Memories

The conversation in our home during October has always been about - Halloween Costumes. The kids have always loved to plan their costumes, gather materials, and make something creative. Sometimes there was a theme, sometimes not. For weeks this subject would be discussed. They even had to worry about what the dog would dress like.

In any case, in honor of Ezra, here are some photos to share as we approach Halloween 2009. When I look at these I remember Ezra's creativity, humor, self confidence, passion, and joie de vivre - Ezra had fun doing everything, he truly loved life. He taught me so much, even through something as silly as dressing up for Halloween. Amazing Ezra, here's to you.

Photos: Ezra as an Oompa Loompa (Milo as Groucho Marx) - 3rd grade. The White Rabbit from Alice and Wonderland - Ryan made that nose through a complicated and scary (for me) process that involved taking a mold of Ezra's face which required him to breath out of straws stuffed up his nose for about 20 minutes while it set. I still shiver. Milo was one of the Queen of Heart's cards that was 4th grade. And last year: Tweedle Dee. All the kids got in on the Alice in Wonderland theme last year. Milo was the Dormouse. Luka was the Mad Hatter.

A New School Year Begins

Excitement and sadness have been in the air of our home this week. As we prepared for the start of a new school year, the excitement built for Milo and Luka, especially for Milo as he is starting a new school this year - middle school!
But of course this excitement is accompanied by our deepest sorrow that Ezra is not starting school this fall. He always loved school so much and looked forward to each new year with great anticipation.

Losing a child causes you to miss that child so desperately - all the time - every day, every second. But certain times are somehow even more painful than others, like a missed birthday, or a graduation, or a summer vacation or the start of a new school year.

Ezra didn't get to go with us to get new school supplies this year and that was sad. We missed him so much. We remembered him running around the store last year, filling our cart with everything from his school list, talking excitedly about what supplies he needed, explaining what pencils he thought were the best, and of course, playing with Milo. Ezra didn't need a new pair of shoes. Ezra didn't try on any of the clothes in the closet to see what fit and what didn't. Milo did that for me and when he tried on some of the things Ezra always wore it took my breath away - he looked so much like Ezra. Ezra didn't get to go to the orientation for new students, etc. So there is lots of sadness intertwined with the excitement and happiness that two of my children are now experiencing.

And so the new school year begins for Luka and Milo and millions of other children and students. I hope everyone is able to enjoy the new school year... The little things, like a new class list, new books and supplies, new pencils, new clothes, and maybe even new shoes. And the bigger things, like a new school, new teachers, new friends and new opportunities. And the biggest thing, LIFE. Hope everyone can enjoy and appreciate being alive this fall.

Photos shown: Milo and Luka posing with Ezra's tiny woodland friends this summer - who accompanied us everywhere we went this summer. And Milo and Ezra on the first day of 4th grade - 2 years ago.

A Pink Dogwood Tree Planted for Ezra at the Guide Dog for the Blind Campus in Oregon

On Saturday, June 27, 2009, a tree was dedicated in memory of Ezra at the Guide Dogs for the Blind campus in Boring, Oregon. Thank you to everyone who donated money for the purchase of this lovely tree and the beautiful plaque - written in both English and Braille. The tree was planted a month or so ago, but this was the day that we dedicated it. We had some of our puppy raiser friends from Seattle and beyond that were able to come down that day and we met together before attending a guide dog graduation there on campus. All of the puppies were sporting showy pink bandanas which they wore proudly around their necks in honor of Ezra. Our Seattle group leader, Heidi said some lovely words about the tree and Ezra. As most of you know, Ezra's favorite color was pink and he loved dogs, so a pink blooming Dogwood tree was perfect for him, as well as for the location at the guide dog campus. After Heidi's remarks we all enjoyed some ice-cream and had a few minutes to visit before going into the graduation.

Inside, as part of the opening remarks for the graduation, Heidi stood up in front of everyone in attendance to tell a little about Ezra and the tree that was planted at the campus in his memory. It was a lovely tribute to him. Thank you Heidi! The graduation was great as usual, with one of our own Seattle puppies graduating - Chaz and one of our West Seattle puppy friends graduating too - Melissa. Congrats to their dedicated puppy raisers and their new partners! After the graduation they have campus tours and as were outside visiting near Ezra's tree we noticed all of the tour groups stopping at his tree to see this lovely living memorial and the beautiful plaque.

This memorial is very sweet to my family and I. And we look forward to visiting it frequently in the coming years.

As many of you know, our family started raising guide puppies a little over 2 years ago. As a family, we had been discussing getting a dog for some time. We had read lots of books about the different breeds and caring for and training pets. Our pet knowledge was limited to a goldfish or two that we had acquired over the years. Yet, somehow, although not particularly a dog person, I wanted the kids to have a dog and thought it would contribute to the idealic childhood I wanted them to have. Then a dear friend of mine from California - Carolyn, told me about how she and her daughter Megan were going to become puppy raisers for Guide Dogs for the Blind. My first response was that I didn't think this was what I had in mind for our family. Raise a puppy, go through all the hard work of training it, fall in love with it, and then give it away! No thank you. But yet, my interest was peaked and this was a person that I love and respect very much. Ryan and I both like the idea of involving the kids in acts of service within our community, but hadn't thought of raising a dog for this purpose. I began finding out more about the puppy raiser program. When I talked to Ryan about it, his first response was similar to mine, he just wasn't sure this was the right project for our kids and not what he had been thinking of when we had decided to get a dog. We thought we would run the idea by the kids since getting a dog was something we were doing for them.

We brought it up at a family meeting, the words were barely out of my mouth - would you rather get a dog that we will keep as a family pet or raise a guide puppy for the blind. "Raise a guide puppy!!!!" - all 3 kids yelled. Their were screams of joy and the happy dance being performed by 3 excited kids. Wait, a second. "Hold on," I said. "This is a big decision, lets talk about what it means to raise a guide puppy." We told them all the requirements, about how we would all have to follow all the rules and all help in the training and then give the dog away and still the excitement never waned. They were hooked - we would raise a guide dog. In the next few months we went to weekly guide puppy meetings and all 5 of us became certified to raise guide puppies.

At the time, my kids were 9, 9, and 10. In the 2+ years the kids have faithfully attended every meeting, helped with all of the dog training, and become great spokespersons for Guide Dogs for the Blind. They have become amazingly insightful dog trainers and handlers and more compassionate people. They have met and worked with many other wonderful puppy raisers and through them others have become interested in this great organization. At my daughter's middle school this year, the students chose to raise money for Guide Dogs for the Blind after learning about this through my daughter. Because of our involvement with Guide Dogs for the Blind, our lives have become greatly enriched and somewhere along the way we have all become "dog people" which I believe is a very good thing.

So thank you Ezra for shouting with joy at the chance to become a puppy raiser. Ezra always loved helping others, always. He knew he could make a difference in the world. He taught me that every person can reach out and help another, no matter how old or young they are or how much money they have. Everyone can do something for someone else. Thank you Ezra. And thank you to everyone who is helping to keep Ezra's memory alive, it means so much to us.

Photos from top: Ezra & Beckley - after 15 months of training & Family shot w/Beckley - Nov 2008. 3 & 4: Beckley under Ezra's desk on the first day of 5th grade, note the pink socks, and though you can't see it, he is wearing a Guide Dogs for the Blind t-shirt. 5: Ezra, Luka, Milo and Beckley @ the puppy truck in December. 6: Ryan, Art - our current guide pup, Beckley - our career change dog and Luka at Ezra's tree. 7) Puppies at Ezra's tree: backrow - Willy (black), Gideon (golden), and Chaz (in harness); Front Row: Art - (yellow), Fantine, Faraja, and Beckley - our career change pet. NOTE: all the photos on this blog can be enlarged simply by clicking on the individual photo.

a pink crane for Ezra from McGilvra 5th graders

On Thursday, we went to McGilvra to meet with the two 5th grade classes.  They had planned a great surprise for our family.  Some talented art parents - Dan, Alessandra, and Tom helped the kids think of a tribute to Ezra and then made it happen.  The result is a beautiful steel crane, powder coated in bright pink, with laser cutouts on each wing that read Ezra Sherman 1998 -2009 and pie + unicyles = Ezra on the other.  These parents designed the crane with help from the 5th graders.  The kids earned money to have the components built, Tom welded the pieces, some work was donated by craftsmen who were touched by Ezra's story, and somehow it all came together before the last day of school!  Thank you to all!

These are the same amazing 5th grade friends who gathered together after school the week Ezra was in the hospital and with the help of some loving parents folded 1000 origami cranes and strung them together on strings, I should add that Milo and Luka were also there to help with this most important effort.  

An ancient Japenese legend promises that whoever folds 1000 cranes will be granted a wish, such as recovery from illness. Ezra's friends faithfully completed 1000 of these cranes, strung them together, and hoped they would see their friend recover from cancer.  Although this specific wish was not granted, the love and care from Ezra's friends and classmates strengthened Ezra and his family during a most difficult time.  Several strands of these cranes are now buried with Ezra and the rest are hanging proudly on our front porch.

The crane was dedicated by his classmates.  Joseph read a poem called Hope, by Emily Dickenson.  

Then Ivy and Courtney read a piece they wrote for the dedication entitled "Ezra"  It reads... "Ezra was a friend to anyone and everyone he met.  He had the rare ability to be exceedingly bright, exceedingly kind and caring, and exceedingly funny.  We all remember Ezra for many reasons, but today we are sharing some of the main reasons he was treasured.  Ezra was the sort of friend who would catch you if you fell, then wipe away the tears.  But his funny side showed more often than not.  For instance hiding Jordan's water bottle was one of the small but very memorable moments that shined in his honor.  He had many shining moment in his life.  Although we are deeply touched by Ezra's absence, we know that he deserved the privilege to go to heaven.  From the heart of the 5th grade."  

Then Dan and his trusted assistant Milo, climbed the entrance to the garden and installed the pink crane.  (If you click on any of these photos they will enlarge for better viewing.)

In the garden is a tree that 5th graders planted for Ezra early this year. While the crane was being installed we all placed wishing rocks around Ezra's tree and decorated it with pink flowers.  It was beautiful.  

Because this art work is on public school grounds, it had to be approved by the school district which took some efforts by these parents to jump through all of the appropriate hoops and make sure that this was all done legally.  

Thank you parents and children of the McGilvra class of 2009.  We will never forget you.  We have been strengthened by your love, support, and thoughtfulness.  Peace and Love, kandice and ryan

Broadway Bound May 2009

As many of you know, Broadway Bound has been a big part of our lives these past few years. For those of you unfamiliar, Broadway Bound is a children's theater for kids - ages 5 to 18.  They put on musicals.  Lots of singing, dancing, and acting.  All 3 of our kids have auditioned and performed in many of their productions.  Ezra and Milo have not missed one since they first began 3 years ago.  

 2 weeks before Ezra went to the hospital he performed in the Wizard of Oz with Milo.  Milo was the Mayor of Munchkin Land and Ezra was the Barrister of Munchkin Land.  They sang a duet together and sang and danced in many of the scenes, loving every minute of it.  

A few days later they auditioned for the next Broadway Bound production, "Once Upon A Mattress," to be performed in May.  The cast list came out the day that Ezra got sick and went to the hospital.  He never got to hear what his role would be.  Milo hoped that he would get better in time to perform and was looking forward to telling Ezra what his part was.  

Ezra never got to hear what part had been assigned to him.  He died the next week - during the first week of rehearsals.  It was hard for Milo to continue going to the rehearsals and to perform his first musical without his brother, but he did it.  Thank you to Jimmy and all of the other Broadway Bound staff and kids who provided love and support to Milo during these past few months.  Thank you for dedicating the production to him - we all loved that!

Many of his friends and family were able to come to one of his performances that took place the last week in May.  Thank you to all for coming and supporting Milo and our family!   For Ryan and I, it was definitely hard not to have Ezra up on stage with Milo, though we knew he was there in spirit.  We miss him so much, but are proud of our kids and the way they are going forward with their lives and doing what they can to honor Ezra.  

Milo's bio in the playbill read: This is my 6th Broadway Bound show.  Woof to Art, my guide dog in training, is he sitting next to you?  My performance is dedicated to my twin brother Ezra who auditioned for this show, but died of Leukemia before rehearsals began.  This one's for you.

Yoga Class in honor of Ezra Sherman 5.17.09

A friend and fellow McGilvra Mom - Ann - will be teaching a yoga class Sunday, May 17, 2009 from 1 to 2:30pm.  The class cost is by donation, with all proceeds to benefit Leukemia research in honor of Ezra.

 This "Open Your Heart" yoga class is open to all levels of yoga experience.  It will be held at Lotus Yoga: 4860 Rainier Ave. S. (upstairs) 98118,  in the Columbia City neighborhood of Seattle. 

Special thanks to Ann and to Lotus Yoga.

I hope all will feel welcome to attend.

Thank you to everyone who is doing something to honor Ezra's life and memory, we appreciate your thoughtfulness, energy, and creativity.  

Big Climb Awards: Ezra Team wins "Community Spirit Award" - raises $9,416!!

Last night we attended the Big Climb Awards Ceremony at the Columbia Tower Club - on the 76th floor of the high rise we climbed to raise money for Leukemia.

The awards ceremony was a very cool event.  They combined both Big Climb fundraisers - the one that we participated in on March 22nd, as well as the one that firefighters participated in on March 8th.  The firefighters' climb was just slightly harder than ours.  They climbed in full combat gear.  It is the largest individual firefighter competition in the world.  Both Big Climbs benefit the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.

The awards party was a formal event with gentlemen wearing suits and firefighters wearing "Class A" uniforms.  We dressed up, Art wore his green guide puppy in training vest. Everyone loved Art.

Awards were presented for top 3 in each category - fundraising, racing, team fundraising and team racing.  

Ezra's team won a special award.  They told a little about Ezra and that he died on February 5, 2009.  They said they got a phone call about a week later from Ezra's 4th grade teacher, wondering if it was too late to get a team together to climb in Ezra's memory. Although Ezra's team was one of the last to sign up, we ended up being in the tenth place for the largest team and 10th place for fundraising - out of hundreds of teams.   Most teams signed up and began fundraising in October 2008, while Ezra was happily living his life.  Ezra's Team had 38 members and raised $9, 416.00.  So our award for was for making it into the top 10 in just over one month.  

HUGE Thank you to everyone that so generously supported our team.  Money raised goes to blood cancer research and aid to current patients living with blood cancers.

Milo was our winning fundraiser, with $1,158.00 - Another HUGE thank you to everyone who donated to him.  He was enormously proud that he could lead our team in this area.

Our family attended the Awards event along with one of Ezra's 5th grade teachers, Ms. C and one of his classmates - Ivy.  It was a great night.  We shared a table with a firefighter that was very impressed with Milo's Big Climb accomplishments in honor of his brother.  Actually more than one firefighter stopped to congratulate Milo, which was very cool.  What can you say about a firefighter all dressed up in a formal uniform, holding a trophy or two, and talking to an 11 year old boy, telling him that they are impressed with him or that they think his accomplishment is cool or that his brother would be proud of him, etc.  A priceless experience.  

So many people have asked me how this fundraiser went, with the economy suffering and all.   The Firefighters raised $640,000 (up $90,000 from last year).  The Big Climb raised about $1,296,000 - final sponsorship money still being counted - (almost $300,000 more than last year).

We had a great experience participating in this event and felt like it was a great way to honor Ezra' s life and memory.  Ezra would absolutely LOVE the Big Climb.  Please consider joining Ezra's Team or pledging us next year, we thank you in advance.  Milo has already started planning for next year's team.  Here we go...

PE Award for Ezra and Boardwalk 5K

This morning Ezra received an award for being a "PE Champion," his brother Milo accepted the award in his honor.  The award was presented by Superintendent of Seattle Public Schools, Maria Goodloe Johnson.  

Our elementary school had about a dozen kids riding on unicycles around Husky stadium in Ezra's honor for the "walk of champions."  Then about 40 McGilvra school supporters joined with others from Seattle Public Schools for the Boardwalk 5K - an event that earns money for the health and fitness programs in our Seattle Public Schools.  Our team was led by our own PE teacher, Ms. Mass, who proudly wore a photo of Ezra unicycling pinned to her back and several others carrying signs with photos of Ezra unicycling.  Photo above from soccer 2006, Ezra at right, Milo at left.

Ms. Mass has also taught an after school unicycling class this semester, dedicated to Ezra.  The class made use of 3 PINK unicycles donated to McGilvra School, by Izilla Toys in honor of Ezra.  When I visited the class one day, one girl came up to me and told me that Ezra inspired her to be a better unicyclist.  How sweet is that! Thank you Ms. M for keeping Ezra's memory alive and honoring his achievements. The unicycling photo above is Milo on the "giraffe," this is something that Ezra had been training to do, and although he had finished all the prerequisites set by Ms. M, he hadn't had the chance to try it before his death.  Milo finished his prerequisites during this afternoon unicycling class and this is him, proudly showing off his new skill.  Congrats Milo.  Thank you Jude for the beautiful Pink unicycles, Ezra would have loved them and Milo has enjoyed riding them at school, as well as today at the Boardwalk 5K event today.  

Ezra's Team- We did it! 69 Flights of Stairs! And over $8,000 in donations!

Yesterday was the Big Climb!  37 of Ezra's brave and fearless friends signed up to climb 69 flights of stairs at the Columbia Tower.  We climbed in Ezra's honor, many of us wearing pink with stickers proudly stating that we were climbing for Ezra!! and earned money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.  Thank you to all who joined us in person and in spirit!  And thank you to everyone who so generously donated money to Ezra's Team!  Many of the teams climbing were organized months ago.  Ezra's team was organized only last month, not long after Ezra went to heaven. After our family signed up for the climb a few weeks ago, Milo in particular has enjoyed watching our team pledges grow.  He was especially delighted to find that people were pledging him.  His excitement grew as his pledges grew.  When his pledges surpassed his team members he became even more excited, he carefully raised his goal every so often.  Finally he felt comfortable to raise his goal to $1000.  When he got home tonight he checked his pledge level - currently at $958!  Then he checked our team $8,341!  And then he checked the home page - bigclimb.org - where they list the top 10 fundraising teams.  Keep in mind there are hundreds of teams and 6,000 participants.  Milo let out a whoop of pure joy when he found our team listed as #9!  This is our first time in the top 10 since we signed up.  And with several more weeks to go, we could still fall out of the top 10, but it was still exciting to see "Ezra's Team" on the list :)  So thank you everyone.  If you still want to donate, feel free -  up until April 10th.  As our climb is likely to become a yearly event, please think about joining us next year - everyone is welcome and it really wasn't as scary as you might think.  Most of the kids scurried up the steps in about 15 to 20 minutes.  And most of the adults finished pretty quickly behind them.  On the 52nd floor, in the stairwell, there was a poster of Ezra, pictured with his dog Beckley wearing his "Guide Puppy in Training" vest from a few short months ago.  Seeing Ezra's picture reminded us why we were huffing and puffing and gave us that extra push to finish the remaining steps.

Ezra's Team for the Big Climb in Seattle

Hi friends, the Big Climb is an event to raise money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Ezra's 3rd and 4th grader teacher - Maria Breuder - has organized a team to climb in Ezra's honor on Sunday, March 22, 2009.   The event will be held at the Columbia Tower in downtown Seattle.  Participants will climb 69 flights of stairs, that's 1311 steps, 788 feet of elevation.  

Our family signed up to join "Ezra's Team" today, we would like everyone who thinks this sounds fun to join us.  If you would like to join or pledge Ezra's Team please go to www.bigclimb.org  Once at the site you can click on either donate and follow the prompts or join a team and follow those prompts.  key word to search for a team is Ezra (password needed to join is ezrasherman).  Our start time for the climb is 2:30pm.  Sounding fun????

Also, as many of you know we set up a memorial fund for Ezra at Bank of America, this is under Ryan Sherman/Ezra Sherman Memorial Fund. 

No pressure, but we know many of you are interested in getting involved, so these are things that we are currently doing to honor Ezra's memory.  Ezra was such an active boy, so we are trying to keep active too!  (photo shown above is our family, summer 2007, after climbing Beacon Rock in the Columbia Gorge, the world's 2nd largest freestanding monolith, elevation 848 feet.  Photo at right is the Columbia Tower in Seattle).

A Snowy Burial Day: February 26, 2009

Although snow is usually rare here in beautiful Seattle, we woke up to yet another snowy day this morning.  I love the way the world looks when it is covered in a white blanket and I always think there is something magical about this white stuff that falls from heaven (I grew up in southern California if that explains anything).  Anyways, I have lost count of how many snow days we have had since December, but we've had many more than any other year since Ryan and I moved here 16 years ago. 

Our house was quiet and still until Milo jumped out of bed screaming, "It's snowing!"  With a 2 hour school delay we had plenty of time to head out for a walk.  We stopped by our neighbor Heath's house and convinced her and the kids to join us on a snowy adventure.  It all felt very much like our snow days in December, except that we were missing Ezra.  We made snowy happy faces on some of the cars in his honor - he did this to dozens of cars during our winter snow days - and we made snow prints and snow angels all the way to Jacob's house where the kids played and made more snow people.  It was a peaceful morning.

At noon, Ryan, Luka, Milo and I headed to Lake View Cemetery.  We were the only ones there for the burial, just as we planned.  We each took a handle and carried Ezra's casket from the suburban - not a hearse - to the burial plot.  Ryan said a prayer to dedicate and protect the grave and I read some favorite scriptures about the resurrection of Jesus.  We talked about how Ezra's spirit is now in heaven and only his body is in that casket and that when the time comes for his resurrection his spirit will rejoin his body which will be safe and protected until that time comes.  When the casket was lowered into the grave, we placed some of the strings of origami cranes over it - made by his loving classmates and dropped rose petals and little love notes over the top as we said our goodbyes.

The cemetery looked lovely in the snow.  We felt good about the location.  We liked Lake View Cemetery because this is where we always took a walk with the kids on Memorial Day, so it feels familiar, even though we don't know anyone personally who is buried here.  Plus it is only 5 minutes away, so that is a bonus (especially since we made about 30+ trips there last week (it took us all awhile to find just the right grave site that we all felt good about). Lake View is adjacent to Volunteer Park and was founded in 1872, it is a non-profit cemetery. Also buried here are Chief Sealth (Seattle)'s daughter Princess Angeline, early pioneers of Seattle - the Mercers, Dennys, Yeslers, etc., J.J. McGilvra (namesake of Ezra's hundred year old Elementary School), and Bruce Lee and his son Brandon. 

Ezra's grave is not marked yet - still more decisions about designing the marker and choosing the materials, etc.  It is on the west side of the cemetary with a view of the Puget Sound in the distance as well as the Space Needle.  

Ezra's casket was made by his dad.  He worked on it in our dining room and on the back deck over the last week.  It is made entirely of pine and fastened with wooden pegs. Milo wrote Ezra's name in cursive on the top, Luka painted over this and then Ryan waxed over the top.  

Ezra's Obituary

Here is a link to Ezra's obituary in the Seattle Times.

Ezra's Obituary

O Happy Day - by Ezra's dad

Yesterday at about this time we were arriving at the chapel for Ezra's service. It was to be a sad day, the day that Ezra's friends would officially say goodbye and one of many for me to do the same. I was expecting to be sad... the funeral for our son. I'm typically a happy guy. I've done neat things in my life...been to neat places, made neat things, and I have a neat family. What I wasn't expecting was that the funeral of my son would be the proudest moment of my life, and while certainly hard, perhaps the happiest as well. Yesterday, I sat in the third pew from the front and listened and watched in awe as Randy and Greg spoke of our boy Ezra and helped me realize the ten years of miracles that was and is Ezra. We heard songs that we played at home, at the ranch, in school, and in church. These songs were sung by his friends, his cousins, his classmates, and his sister and brother. Music was played on piano, guitar, banjo, and cello, by true friends, who happened to be Ezra's music teachers, theater associates, friends, and family. After a few songs, I realized that although I had tears streaming down my cheeks, my face had the biggest smile on it that I have ever had (my cheeks are honestly sore today from smiling yesterday).

While it was the funeral for our boy Ezra, I had the pleasure to be in the midst of about 500 people singing together, listening together, and laughing together as we rejoiced in the life of a special boy who brought so much to those around him. Sitting next to my amazing wife Kandice, I again realized that it has been a true honor for us to be his parents for the nearly eleven years of his earthly life.

Yesterday was the funeral of my son and I was the happiest one there. I am emboldened by the knowledge that I raised a special boy who spent his days bringing joy and life to those around him during his time on Earth, and I know that Ezra will continue to be a beacon of faith and hope for many during the years to come.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Yesterday was Ezra's funeral - or more appropriately - our celebration of Ezra's life and the goodness that he inspired in others. It was just what Ryan and I had hoped it would be - a celebration, mostly thru song, but also thru some inspirational remarks and scriptures. What an awe inspiring experience for us - Ezra's family - to be surrounded by so many of our friends who loved us and were touched by the life of our sweet boy Ezra. Many thanks to all who participated on the program, to all who helped us pull the program together, to all who were able to attend, and to all those who had wanted to be there but were unable - we still felt your love from afar! It was a beautiful, perfect celebration and we felt truly blessed to be there celebrating with all of you.

As always, our sincere thanks to all of our friends and family who are supporting us and strengthening us during this period of loss and sadness. You are helping us to get through this difficult journey and we love you.

Ezra's Funeral Services - Thursday February 12, 2009

Dear friends, please join us to celebrate the life of Ezra Sherman.  

Services will be held at 10:30am at the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  5701 8th Avenue NE 98105   The church is located in the U-District just off the 5 FWY at 50th Street Exit.

We hope that all of Ezra's friends will join us - from McGilvra, our neighborhood, Broadway Bound, Seattle Guide Puppies, church, etc.  This location is large enough to accommodate all of us.  There is a large parking lot behind the church, but we will still encourage you to carpool if possible.  The service will be pretty light and kid friendly.  It will include mostly musical numbers, including a song or two from Ezra and Milo's 5th grade classmates.  I would guess the service will last pretty close to an hour.

Following the service there will be a social.  If you would like to bring a small plate of something yummy to share, you are welcome to do so.  I have a feeling there will be plenty of food, so don't stress about this.  Socials were always a favorite of Ezra's and I hope there will be many of his friends there following his tradition of filling a plate with a cookie or two, a brownie, a cupcake, and maybe one lone carrot stick.  You get the picture.  

As far as dress goes, men and boys - if you want to wear a suit feel free, but something more casual is fine too.  I would tell my own son not to wear anything sloppy, I am guessing Milo will wear a suit.  Ladies & girls - dresses/skirts/nice pants.  Please don't wear black (unless your suit or coat is black of course!),  keep in mind Ezra was a kid that liked bright colors - and as most of you know, his favorite color was pink. If he were attending, he would wear his suit, with his pink shirt and one of his pink ties:)

Ezra Sherman - We Love You!

I thought it would be nice to have a place for people to tell something they knew or loved about our boy Ezra.  Just a favorite memory.  I'll go first and mine will be the longest, but please indulge me.

Ezra couldn't wait to be born and start his life on earth.  He and his identical twin brother Milo, were born at 32 weeks.  Our boys weighed the exact same amount to the gram, which we've been told is very unusual - what a surprise.  

Although born early, Ezra and Milo began crawling on the same day - a week before they turned 5 months old.  They were cruising by 6 months and could walk by 8 months.  Those boys were never ones to sit or stand still and they always reached every mile stone together - on the same day!

Enough baby stories.  Ezra has always LOVED music.  He played the violin for a year, he played the cello for a year, he started the clarinet this year, and he played the piano for the last 4 years.  He could listen to any song and then sit down at the piano and pick out the tune and play it by ear.  He loved to go through all of our old cds and pick out things to play.  He loved the Beatles, Norah Jones, Bob Dylan, and a local a cappella group called "The Coats," Gershwin, Jazz, and so much more - he loved to sing and dance along - always in a silly way and when he was especially moved he would then hit the pause button and run over to the piano and pick out the same tune, playing it over and over until he got it just right and then add in some little flourishes.  Ezra was always one to add a flourish to everything!  He often signed his name with an exclamation point - EZRA!

Ezra loved performing.  He LOVED Broadway Bound.  He first production was Annie in 3rd grade, he played Mr. Bundles, a servant, and several other small parts.  He had 7 different costumes to keep track of and loved every minute of it.  Next came Seussical.  He was the Mayor of Whoville and he loved his bright green and pink costume Rita made for him and he got to ride his unicycle in the Circus McGirkus.  In 4th grade he was in Singing In the Rain.  He played Flick and an assistant director.  He got to learn some tap dancing and had a blast.  Next up was Grease.  he played a student and a rock n roller and loved doin' the Hand Jive.  And he loved this cast that was filled with so many of his friends from McGilvra.  Most recently Ezra performed in the Wizard of Oz last month.  He was the Barrister of Munchkin Land and got to sing a duet and dance with Milo, who was the Mayor of Munchkin Land.  He wanted to be in as many of these productions in a row as he could - he loved participating in these shows.  He loved the comraderie, the excitement, the challenge, the friendships, the exhillartion of being on stage and mostly just the FUN.  Thanks Jimmy and all the other wonderful people who make this program possible.

Ezra loved going to school.  He loved his teachers.  He loved his friends.  He loved learning.  He felt apart of the McGilvra community and genuinely loved it there.  He never wanted to miss school, ever.  Although the recent snow days were fun, Ezra wished he could still have gone to school instead.  He liked to be there with his friends, and after reading all of your kind and loving posts it is really no wonder.  Thank you McGilvra family - and I hope all of you kids know I would love a hug from you anytime - I am feeling pretty close to all of you sweet kids!  And please keep hiding Jordan's water bottle for Ezra (sorry Jordan - and Ms. Kierstead and Ms. Calvert!)

Ezra was a helper.  He loved to help people.  Anyone in need, Ezra was there.  He wanted to rake the neighbor's leaves before they got home from work.  He was always the first to rub my back when I sat down - and boy was he a most excellent back rubber!  He raised guide puppies for the blind.  He would stay after church meetings to take down chairs and put them away.  He would sweep our front steps without being asked.  He seemed to always know when there was something he could do for someone and he would try to do it.  Is it any wonder that the name Ezra is Hebrew means "help," "helper," and "helper of God."

Ezra was generous.  I'll never forget the day I told him about the Tsunami in Asia.  He ran upstairs and got his piggy bank, ran back to me, opened it and dumped out all of his money.  He wanted every cent to be given to the relief aid, he didn't hold anything back for himself.  He was that kind of a boy.  Knowing that all of my kids had wanted a pet for years, I asked them 2 years ago if they wanted to get a pet dog or raise a guide dog for the blind, all jumped up cheering and chanting "Guide Dog, Guide Dog!" Ezra never missed a training class, went to several guide dog graduations, and took all of his puppy raising duties seriously.  Although he knew he would be sad to give his puppy away one day he knew it would be ok, because he wanted to give that gift of love to someone.  He loved that he was helping make someone else's life better and never thought about it as a sacrifice or a chore.  Ezra would give anything he had to anyone who needed it or wanted it for that matter.  He had a big heart and loved to make someone else smile by giving them something.  He shared his smile and his life with many.

Ezra loved little children.  He was very sweet and nurturing with them.  He thought they were fun and funny!  At church he liked to sit behind 5 year old Lucy and 3 year old Charlotte.  He liked to make faces at them and make them smile.  He would say things like, "Mom, Charlotte is really growing up isn't she?"  Or he would remember something silly Lucy had said and then repeat it over and over saying, "wasn't that cute mom?"  He loved all the little neighborhood kids.  He loved greeting them and playing with them.  And he thought they were cool and considered them his friends.

Ezra was very artistic.  He loved drawing and kept a sketch book near his pillow.  He would often sketch before he went to sleep.  He wanted to be an Imagineer for Disney when he grew up.

Ezra was fun.  He was ALWAYS thinking of fun, creative things to do.  He LOVED life and was constantly in motion.  He was pretty much always happy.  Always with a sly grin and a wink.  Always ready to do a silly dance to make me laugh or sing in a silly opera voice or whatever.  And best of all he had Milo, his best friend who thought he was funny and always liked his ideas.  The two of them together were like poetry in motion or a twister spinning out of control, depending on your current frame of mind.  

Ezra was a good brother to his sister Luka and he loved her.  He thought she was awesome.  He was proud of her and interested in what she was doing and liked to be with her.  They sat next to each other in the car.  Not that anyone ever assigned seats, but that just sort of happened. 

Ezra loved unicycling, he could unicycle forward and backward and rock back and forth and hop up and down and pedal using only one foot.  He was truly ready for the circus.  He also loved waveboarding and always looked so graceful weaving back and forth down the sidewalk. He made it look so easy, I still haven't mastered it, but I'm going to Ezra!

Ezra had faith and believed in God and his Savior Jesus Christ.   I have his scriptures next to my bed and like me, he had already started tucking little notes and cards and pieces of paper inside of them.  One of the little notes I found inside had a scripture from Psalms 82:6 "All of you are children of the most high."  Another note card he got from his sunday school class says, "I have a Father in Heaven who loves me."  He believed in prayer and prayed with our family and at his bedside.  He always talked to God like he knew God was listening and just like a child speaking to their Father.  He recently gave a talk in front of our entire church congregation about being a peacemaker.  And one scripture that he loved was one that he had memorized to recite in front of the congregation, Isaiah 9:6 "For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, the mighty God, the everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace."

Ezra loved playing with his cousins, none of whom live in Seattle.  He loved reunions in Seaside, Oregon, where he got to play with his cousins from sun up to sun down.  He would spend his days digging huge holes in the sand with his cousins and jumping in the icy cold waves.  He adored his grandma and grandpa Hemsley and loved visiting them.  He missed his grandma and grandpa Sherman, who he is now visiting with in heaven.

His favorite place on earth was the Sherman Family Ranch - thank you to Grandpa Sherman for purchasing that way back in 1964, it is an amazing place where we can all enjoy the beauty of this world in total peace.  Ezra's summers were mostly spent at the ranch where he would spend his days outside exploring, building forts, swimming in the lake, building damns, going on walks, and picking blackberries.  At night he would put on plays with Milo and Luka for his mom and dad to enjoy.  A favorite would be acting out episodes from I Love Lucy, where he would often play the roles of both Fred and Ethel.

At home Ezra's favorite traditions were having dutch babies for breakfast on Sunday mornings, Friday family movie night - where we watched everything from old classics like the Marx brothers films and Bringing Up Baby, etc. to musicals to more recent favorites, like Elf - which he had memorized, "You like sugar don't you?"  He loved going on walks in the Arboretum, family bike rides, and walking in the neighborhood - well not walking so much, he was actually never very happy walking, he always wanted to ride a skateboard, waveboard, roller blade, or ride his unicycle.  Walking was too slow for him.  He liked riding his bike to school with his dad and wanted to ride the STP with his dad.  And Ezra loved going to Disneyland with his family and helping to plan the trip and trading disney pins.

Ezra was bold and liked to wear bright pink.  He had a favorite bright pink shirt he loved to wear.  He had pink socks and pink converse - not worn at the same time.  Usually the polka dot socks were worn with the pink converse.  He had panache.

So this was our boy.  Please feel free to add a favorite story or memory, just something short please, don't write a long post like I just did, but a brief comment would be beautiful.

February 6, 2009 5pm

Dear Friends, again thank you for the outpouring of love, support, and friendship. It continues to touch us, to strengthen us, and to bear us up during this time of loss.

Many of you reading this blog don't know it, but many of these posts are being left by Ezra's 10 and 11 year old classmates. You kids are the greatest. So kind and generous. I'm in tears as I read your sweet comforting remarks and offers to be there for Milo. Thank you! And Luka's friends too! And you high school kids. Everyone, BIG thanks you are helping us during this most difficult time.

We stopped by Ezra's school today and were overwhelmed by all of the love - thank you dear friends, you are amazing. It took my breath away when I saw the flag flying at half mast. And then the candles and rose petals on the front steps and the shrine in the library with Ezra's desk and unicycle and belongings. I hope that someone else will write more about these significant and touching memorials, they were so thoughtful and beautiful.

Also thanks to all who have left candles burning on our porch, as well a 1000 paper cranes, flowers, and gifts. We feel overwhelmed and touched by these thoughtful gestures of love.

So, I just wanted to give a few more details about Ezra's sudden illness which lead to his tragic death yesterday evening.

Don't feel like you have to read all these details, it is just for those of you that are interested in things like that.

As you know Ezra was at school last Friday and all seemed to be well. He played after school with his brother and some friends on the soccer field. Later he wasn't feeling well, Ryan and I decided to take him to urgent care at Group Health as it was after normal doctor hours. The doctor who saw Ezra immediately did a blood draw and had an IV in him. While they waited for tests, we had a neighbor and member of our church meet us there. He (Robert) and Ryan laid there hands on Ezra's head and gave him a Priesthood Blessing, a special blessing given to heal the sick. I took a sigh of relief after this blessing was given to Ezra.

Minutes later the test results came back and we heard the words Leukemia for the first time. My head was spinning as I sat by Ezra's side and we raced in the ambulance to Seattle Children's Hospital. And at this point I have to add a side note - Guys, when you hear the siren pull over FAST, please. There are lives on the line! I could hear our ambulance driver on the loudspeaker ordering people to pull over to the right. It was pretty scary. All this was less than an hour from when we left home with our boy Ezra and left Luka and Milo home watching a movie in our bed.

At Children's within minutes of walking into the ER we heard that the doctors feared Ezra had some bleeding in his brain. Bleeding in the brain? What? I thought they just told me Leukemia a few minutes ago. What is going on?

So because doctors are really smart about stuff like this, they knew that something major was wrong with the way Ezra looked and acted - he was unconscious. They did a CT scan and this confirmed their fear. There were 2 large brain bleeds. We were rushed to the ICU.

Ryan and I, were scared. The doctors were scared. They feared Ezra might die from them soon, possibly that night.

So how did he get bleeding in his brain anyways? What about the cancer? Well, in Ezra's case the cancer, which they didn't know which type it was yet - had made it so that his blood would not clot. So kids, this means that when you get a cut you bleed, but then you stop bleeding and you put a little bandaid on and you're pretty much good to go. Because of the cancer Ezra's blood was not able to clot, so he couldn't stop bleeding. The doctors think that sometime late that afternoon or early evening Ezra had a tiny blood vessel deep inside his brain burst. If Ezra didn't have leukemia, no problem. But because of Leukemia he couldn't stop bleeding.

But, we still had hope that the bleeding had stopped or would soon stop.

The doctors began immediately giving blood transfusions, platelets, and the FFP - the fresh fruity punch - sometimes called Fresh Frozen Plasma. All of this could perhaps help Ezra stop the bleeding in his brain. Also, the oncologists began treating Ezra's leukemia immediately. Within minutes of arriving in the ICU they began chemotherapy.

The next morning they did an MRI. This takes a really detailed picture of the brain. News was not good again. They told us that the bleeding was significant. The doctors in the ICU believed Ezra would probably die that day.

Ryan and I still had faith that Ezra could be OK, IF it was God's will. We hoped that it was God's will that Ezra continue to live. The doctor's told us that although Ezra's condition was dire, but that we should definitely believe that a miracle could happen. We believed.

Meanwhile, the cancer doctors were worried that Ezra's cancer might kill him. They were rushing tests to determine which type it was so they could know how to treat him. The initial test results arrived late on Saturday. It was either AML or APL. These are more rare and more difficult to treat than ALL. The doctors again were very concerned. Mostly because of the way Ezra's cancer presented itself. So everybody knows you've got your white blood cells and your red blood cells. So normally you and I might have between 7 and 11 thousand white blood cells. Over 20,000 the doctors are going to start thinking about Leukemia. Ezra's initial blood test showed over 310,000 white blood cells. This extremely high number was exceedingly unusual (like we all know Ezra was - always unusual - but usually Ezra was unusual in a good way!!:) Most doctors have never seen counts anything like that. They were very concerned. So the cancer docs were focused on the cancer and how the cancer was so intense it was killing Ezra, so they were treating his cancer. Most kids with Leukemia have ALL which is much less intense and doesn't threaten the body so aggressively.

Due to the extremely high white blood count, things weren't looking good for Ezra. They began intense chemo. We got a whole spreadsheet explaining all of his different chemo medications, I chose to not spend too much time looking at those.

By Sunday they had determined it was AML. Only about 20% of childhood Leukemia patients have AML. They have about a 40% survival chance, depending on which category they fall into: Favorable, Intermediate, or Less Favorable. We didn't know yet which category Ezra was in. His chemo treatment changed some. Because this type of cancer is so aggressive he was getting large doses of these powerful toxic treatments. These treatments could kill him, but if they didn't give him this type of treatment the cancer would kill him. We voted for the chemo. With this type of Leukemia, the cancer is very aggressive so the treatment is too. It is not long and drawn out, it is only a few months. If he would have lived, he would have needed bone marrow or stem cell transplant. We didn't spend too much time discussing cancer treatments, as when you are in the ICU - that's intensive care unit - it is all about keeping critical patients alive. I hoped we would make it to the Cancer Floor and get to fight this disease. We would never get to leave the ICU.

Each day, the ICU docs told us how critical Ezra's condition was and that he probably wouldn't live through the day. But each day they were surprised to find Ezra still alive. No doubt from all the prayers on his behalf.

And later in the blog I mentioned that they did find out that Ezra was not in the "favorable" recovery group. They are still waiting for results to hear if was in the "intermediate" or "less favorable," category. Not that it matters now, but they thought it likely he was in the latter category, due to his extremely high white blood cell count.

They began taking Ezra off his medication that was keeping him asleep (although he never did wake up and the last time we spoke to him was in our home last Friday evening), and he did show some signs of reflexes, which was good and gave us hope. But the night before he died his blood pressure went up, which was a signal to them that things were not good.

They took him in for another CT and found the swelling in his brain had increased - from his "significant bleeds." There was no longer anything they could do to help him. It was catastrophic. Even you 5th graders know that just sounds bad. And it was.

And that is how and why my little boy died. Ezra Sherman died from AML Leukemia. He was almost 11 years old. He died at 5:40 pm. Ryan, Milo, Luka, and I spent the entire day with him. Beckley sat on the chair next to his bed, licking his face, and later lying next to his bed - for 4 hours. We were all there around him, sitting on his bed, whispering sweet nothings in his ears, holding his hands, rubbing his chest and tummy, and toes and thanking him for his great life and his valiant fight, and encouraging him to return to his Father in Heaven who created his spirit, and loved him just as much or even more than we did and was anxiously waiting for his return. He quietly and peacefully took his last breaths. He did not struggle. I think he was relieved. He fought the good fight. He lived strong.

So what about my miracle? Why isn't Ezra still alive? Well, I believe that my miracle was having 6 days longer with Ezra. The doctors really believed he would die that first night. His condition was so severe. We were all scared to death. But he did not die that night. He lived. He lived strong. And during those 6 days my family and I experienced the greatest outpouring of love from family and friends and people we've never even met than we have ever experienced in our lives.

We had time to start this blog, which has been one of the greatest blessings we could ever imagine or dream of. And through this blog we were able to hear of so many prayers being offered on our behalf - from people of every religion and faith. It was so beautiful! I know that Ezra would be happy to have so many people praying and thinking about God. And reaching out in love to others. Ezra was the kindest, sweetest boy and he was a believer. He knew God knew him and loved him.

I haven't talked to much about my religion or faith. We belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Many people don't know much about our religion, but we are Christian. We believe Jesus Christ is our Savior. We believe God created us and that he is a kind and loving God. We believe that we return to him when we leave this earth and we believe that the family unit is eternal. To us that means that we will be with our precious Ezra when this life is over. Our family will be together forever.

So although it is difficult to say good-bye. I have faith I will see my boy again and he will always be my boy. I don't understand how everything works or what exactly will happen after this life, but I feel certain I will be with him again. This gives me peace.

Thank you everyone for praying for my son. I believe that ALL the prayers were heard and answered. Maybe not in the way we hoped, but maybe for the best. As you hear this whole long story, you see that his chances for returning to his former healthy, happy self were not great. Ezra was such a great person. Maybe I will have to add one more post to tell some of the special things about him. Sorry this has been such a long post.

Thank you dear friends for accompanying us on this difficult journey. You made the journey such much easier to bear. Words will never be enough to share the feelings of my heart. As I returned home last night from the hospital, after the death of my son - something I never thought I would say - I was so sad and tired and I just sat by the computer and read your posts, surrounded by my family and feeling the Love. An amazing friend showed up unexpectedly with dinner in hand and then slowly candles and other little treasures showed up on our porch. Then we all went up to bed and had a great big slumber party with Milo, and Luka and Beckley joining Ryan and I in our not very big bed. Who can sleep on a night like that? HUGE thank you. Kandice and family xoxoxo